Everyday Bliss

In case you missed all the clues I’ve been dropping on Twitter, FaceBook, LinkedIn and other places, I am going to be spending my birthday month of APRIL IN PARIS, baby! Paris! (pictoral tour of the ‘hood is down below) Yep, I’m leaving the hubby and kitties at home and going on an all-inclusive American Woman’s Dream Vacation of a Lifetime to celebrate that once in a lifetime marker for a woman:

TURNING 50 YEARS OLD
(made it…whew!)

And…stay tuned because I’m going to make it possible for YOU TO COME WITH ME. Yep, you read it right,

YOU CAN COME TO PARIS WITH ME!

While not everyone can jump a jet and come on over, you CAN  check it out live and won’t have to leave the comfort of your armchair. Promise. I wouldn’t go without taking everyone interested in evolution, transformation, a LIVE ETHOS workshop, new friends, gourmet food, sexy accents and having a good time!

Hold onto your hats: there’s more juice in this baby than a whole orchard full of fresh peaches!

You probably already know that 25 years ago I was hit by a drunk driver and paralyzed, gaining over 150lbs. And how it took me nine years to walk, even though the doctors said I would never walk again.

I’ll be teaching some super-secrets of how I taught myself how to do “the impossible” and reverse paralysis, PLUS how I’ve lost 70+ pounds in the last year and a bit. Add to that my own “energy facelift” exercises and how YOU too can learn to:

“ACHIEVE THE IMPOSSIBLE”

• Everybody’s been asking me why my pants are falling off! You’ll have a ringside seat as I CONTINUE TO LOSE WEIGHT in Paris, scarfing down all that lovely  gluten-free super-fresh French market food. I’ll teach you how to make some of my favorite yummy dishes too, so you get “Gourmet Paris” and “GlutenFree” too.
• Yes, I’m down four sizes and counting. You’ll learn some of my extra cool weightloss secrets, too
• Plus you’ll visit Parisian restaurants, get to meet neighbors and friends and get the scoop on famous landmarks and not-famous-but-cool Parisian places, people and things.
• You’ll even get to help PLAN MY DAY by telling me where YOU want to go in Paris. I’ll  take you with me – it’ll be the next best thing to being there!
• And of course, you’ll also learn how to Achieve The Impossible in your own life through THIRTY WHOLE DAYS OF LIFE-SHIFTING LESSONS, learning how to get yourself to Possible and Do-able. That’s the Whole Point. 
• You also really need to be here if you’ve always wanted to have a super jumbo deluxe vacation for yourself and you never got to take one.
• Oh yes, there will be massage and spa stuff. And coffee. And sidewalk cafe action. And girlfriends. And a live ETHOS Workshop. And lots and LOTS of energy.

I’ll be getting back to you a little later on the specifics, but if you’re interested in becoming an Early Adopter (we reward Early Adopters very heavily around here)  you can join the  “Achieve The Impossible” Experience in Paris  by filling in this handy form. I’ll be holding some very special calls and giving you previews of what’s going to happen and also what isn’t. Only those on this list will get notification of these juicy free calls, so do sign up now – I’ll even send you a free gift!

“Doggone our families! Why can’t they just ‘get’ us sometimes?”. Lia, who’s been mentoring with me for several years was quite cross over her sister’s unwillingness to use EFT to deal with her marital breakup. Lia had cured her sugar addiction in coaching with me using EFT and wanted badly to help her sister, Martha.

Martha felt EFT was “too weird” however, and wouldn’t discuss it further, telling Lia “that stuff’s okay for you but it’s just too way out there for me”. Lia was frustrated, sick with worry for her sister (which we tapped on) and didn’t know what to do next.

I can SO relate.

When I first started to share energy coaching with my non-energy-savvy family, they raised their eyebrows, laughed, politely patted my hand and said “it’s great you found a hobby, dear”.

Most of us have had friends or relatives roll their eyes at one another and been the odd duck out in more traditional circles when we try to share energy transformation modalities.

But there’s a great way you can get people into the joys of living a clearer, happier life through energy work. And that is….

Drop the jargon.

Don’t say one acronym – not ETHOS, not EFT, not BSFF or any of the hundred others you might know.

In fact, don’t talk about the tool at all.

Just casually talk to your friends or family members about how they feel. And as you’re speaking with them about what isn’t right in their life, as they are in the depths of the “Dang it, if only I’d have had the guts to….” or “It just KILLS me that I didn’t…” or “I can’t stop thinking about it, and it’s driving me nuts!”

Ask: “How would you rather feel?”

This usually stops people in their tracks.

“Huh?” they’ll say “What do you mean?”

“I mean, what would you really want to feel like, if you could drop this feeling of (hurt, anger, betrayal, jealousy, guilt, shame etc.)?”

Then listen and be really open to what they are telling you without the NEED on your part to fix them, or what’s going on.

Your dropping the need you have to make it all better for other people is HUGE!

When I realized this, and simply listened without attachment to the other person’s outcome (and we’re talking about people I’d gladly give my life for, dear friends and family members), all of a sudden, THEY became more open to what I had to say about HOW to make their situation better.

Then, when they’ve told you how they’d rather feel, acknowledge what they’ve said and ask them:

“Would you like to get a little bit of the way to that place right now?”

If they say yes, then if you practice EFT for instance, get them to tap their HAND points as they tell you their story. Importantly, get them to rate their SUDS or intensity of feeling BEFORE you begin tapping.

And chances are, you’ll get them a good piece of the way down the road, not just a little bit, but it’s a good clean-energy practice to under-promise and over-deliver. That way, folks you’re working with get that extra bit that makes them feel like they got a bonus for free. And that’s something we all love. 

It’s important to start off with something they won’t immediately dismiss as weird looking or “too much to remember”. Using just the hand points addresses a large amount of the person’s intensity level without the overwhelm the whole EFT “recipe” can bring new tappers.

You tap, and tell them just to follow what you’re doing as they tell their story. By and by they’ll be on autopilot, tapping their finger points and karate chop point and telling their story.

As they tell their story, tail enders will come up, guide them to tap on these using just the hand points as well.

When they’ve been talking and tapping for about five minutes, ask them to rate their SUDS or intensity level again.

Most will find a few points shaved off, if not more. I’ve had family look at me with surprise on their faces and say bluntly “I thought all that stuff was just [*steer manure*], but I’ll be doggoned, this [*manure*] really works!”

Now, they enthusiastically tap with other family members who think they’re just as cuckoo as I am.

But they feel better about themselves and their lives. And I don’t care if they think I’m cuckoo, as long as we all feel the best we possibly can.

Because, and this is another important lesson, especially for newbies, the better we feel, the more better feeling experiences we attract.

And that’s a story for another day.

I hope this has been helpful. Let me know how you’re teaching your family to use the energy methods you know and love – you can put a post in the forums or in a blog on the ETHOS Community at:

http://ethosmethod.ning.com

Or feel free to leave a comment on this post below – use the handy-dandy tools in the orange bar at the bottom of the page to keep up the conversation!

Happy Valentine’s Day to you & a lovely rest of the week!

Warm Blessings,
Maryam

With thanks to Heather Wibbels, I give you, the Glowing Sheep of  Wales. This is something you’ve got to see to believe. Especially the Mona Lisa and the fireworks bit at the end. Sheer brilliance fellas!

From my favorite Good News Site, www.gimundo.com:

…the premium Swiss chocolate company Callebaut claims to have solved both of these chocolate conundrums with the invention of a brand new confection known as the Voulcano.

Read the inventor’s article on this here.

What’s so special about the product? According to founder Barry Callebaut, the new bar is completely melt-resistant to hot weather: it’s able to withstand temperatures up to 131 degrees Fahrenheit without getting sloppy. Even better, the new chocolate, which will be available in both bar and cookie form, will contain up to 90 percent less calories than a typical piece of chocolate.

It sounds revolutionary, but the question, of course, is the taste. Is there any possibility that a Vulcano chocolate could compare to the luscious flavor of your favorite Lindt bar? Callebaut claims that it can—and, if the company’s right, they may have struck (black) gold.

“It’s nice and chocolatey, with a strong aroma, and crispy rather than creamy,” a Callebaut spokesperson, Gaby Tschofen, told The Guardian. “It does melt in the mouth, but it is the enzymes in saliva rather than the heat of the tongue that causes it to dissolve.”

Read the rest of this article here.

What is that furrow
on your brow,
a sigh of sorrow
imprinted on the skin?
What clings sullen
to the bone,
contracting your heart?

What do you fear,
have horror of,
long to forget,
despise and loathe
so much

that it leaves its
convoluted intent
on the roadmap
of your face?

And more importantly,
what do you REALLY desire?

Think on that and know:

That nothing is truly wrong.

Nothing is truly required of you,

but to live and be happy.

What is meant for you can never truly be lost,
because nothing can actually be lost.

Lost is a point of view,
a Limiting Belief.

Though forms may change,
everything always exists
for energy cannot be destroyed.

What is meant for you is still right in front of you.

Have you the eyes to see it?

Have you the ears to hear its message?

Have you the heart to feel its

fresh,

pure,

delicious energy…

pulling you forward?

If not…

Step aside,

into the Real You…

and continue the journey.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

* Travelogue: Been fueled on inspiration from the stunning Oregonian waterfalls this week on our tour of the Pacific Northwest. I snapped the above picture at Multnomah Falls prior to a hike where we got ecstatically drenched. The words rolled out during an intro on ETHOS that I taught in a community center shortly after that.  “Stepping aside” is ETHOS speak for stepping back inside our Unlimited Self – that energetic template of the ‘perfect you’ that we all started out in life, and that is still available to us. The ETHOS Method is a free, worldwide healing and consciousness tool that I created, and you can learn more about here.

I just met a wonderful new person on Twitter: @stillettochick a.k.a. Betty-Ann Heggie. She’s an energy junkie like me and had this wonderful post on her blog:

Is the Energy in Your City Serving You?

Aug 28, 2009 – Saskatoon, Sask.: Is the energy of your city serving you? A friend in Europe emailed me to say that when she enters a city, she feels the energy and can tell whether it’s male or female. For instance, she spent most of her life in Zurich and got a definite masculine vibe from its focus on production efficiency. She now lives in Prague, which has been called the “mother of cities”; indeed, she feels a warm, loving, healing embrace from the city. I experienced this when our daughter was choosing a university. We drove to many good schools that she wasn’t even interested in touring once we arrived and she felt the energy of the city.

To see if there was anything to this, I contacted Patty Beach, an expert on masculine and feminine energy…

This is a great article as is Betty-Ann’s blog. I spent a few moments reading through articles here today and now have a great new blog to add to my daily reading list.

Check out the rest of this great post at Betty-Ann’s blog:  Stilletto Chick Sees The World.

There’s nothing for revealing the truth like a chat with a girlfriend. I was talking this summer to my bookkeeper and gal pal Paula about how much we loved our lives and why others we knew didn’t. Paula said to me “You know Maryam, people just want to feel good about themselves. But in this economy, and with all the violence going on in the world, they just don’t. What can we do to help people out?”

Why don’t people love their lives? It’s a question that has driven many of us (me included) into therapy, coaching, spiritual studies and years of self-examination. For many here, it’s what has driven us to divorce, separation and anxiety-driven lifestyles.

We talked some more about how much of what appears in our lives is illusory, and how people sometimes buy into illusions that make them miserable. People are going through some very hard times caused by those illusions right now and misery is widespread. The rough truth of this caught my attention – this is something I can help with, I thought.

I examined my life to determine why, other than the obvious,I loved my life when many with far more in the way of possessions and prestige seemed so miserable. I came to some valuable conclusions that I wanted to share with you, as I believe just examining these issues in your life can make you so much happier. I am presenting these as coaching questions for you to use alone or with a mastermind partner or coaching buddy, and to pass on to those whose happiness you care about.

Powerful Coaching Questions
To Start Loving Your Life Again

1)  If you shed the false illusions you live under, you’ll be a lot happier. An example of a false illusion might be “If s/he falls in love with me, my life will be perfect.” That makes YOUR emotional state dependent on the whims of someone else. Who may never fall in love with you, or if they do, may turn out to be a nightmare.

Same thing goes with “When I win the lottery, I’ll finally be happy” or “When the divorce finally comes through I’ll be happy”. Why wait? Choose to be happy today, regardless! Happiness is available to both princess and pauper. What we think of as externally-created emotions are ALL self-generated chemical combinations cooked up inside your own body. YOU have the power to change your emotional state simply by choosing what you want. So ask yourself: “What is True about this situation?” All of it? None of it? 15% of it?

What is yours, take responsibility for and change. What comes from someone else, give back.

To do that, ask of unwanted emotions: “Who does this belong to?”  Is the illusion self-created, or another person’s that you’ve bought into? Women are tremendously sensitive to energy. Oftentimes the angst, sudden anger or even menstrual cramps you’re feeling don’t really belong to you, but come from your neighbor next door or a stranger you passed in a crowd.

Our bodies are giant tuning mechanisms for Radio Station Y-O-U. What you give the most attention to in your thoughts will broadcast outward energetically and will attract back to you similar emotions, situations and people. One of the things your body does naturally is to “pick up” other people’s broadcasts of negative emotions, pain, or symptoms. This too is an illusion, because these feelings aren’t really yours. Asking “who does this belong to” helps you realize – and drop – other’s expectations and energy.

2)  You don’t need to know the answer to any of these questions, just keep asking them and the change will happen. If you learn to live in the question, without hardening and fixing your expectations around “the one true answer”, you’ll be happier because answers come more abundantly. Bellyaching about how bad things are or saying “this is just the way it is and there’s no point in hoping for better” only keeps you in the rut you’re in.

When you say “I wonder what it would take to start my own business?” instead of griping about not having one, you free yourself to go find out what it would take, get funding if necessary, study up for professional exams and so on. Use “I wonder what it would take…” to defuse the natural human tendency to gravitate towards the negative.

3) If we know the right questions to ask, we open up even more possibilities for happiness than ever before. Here’s an absolute barn-burner of a question to ask – and not be attached to any answer or outcome of:

“What generative energy, space and consciousness can I be to manifest ______________?”

Then say: “Anything that wouldn’t allow that to happen, I uncreate, dissolve and release it completely” and let it go.

If you have difficulty letting things go, I created a quick and easy consciousness bringing method that features healing of “issues” as a welcome side effect. It’s called ETHOS, it works beautifully, invisibly, and is entirely free to the public. You can download the whole method and participate if you like, in our online support community at: http://ethosmethod.ning.com

Put these questions to work and I guarantee, you’ll be happier, open more options in your life and witness amazing things happening that you never would have expected – gifts from nowhere, funds you forgot you were owed, old friends calling you’d wondered about just this morning and more. I’ve even seen miracle cures when people simply stopped needing to know the answer and rested contentedly in the arms of the question.

Try it, you’ll see!

And if you want more structured support around getting happy please do join our “Ethos For Loving Your Life Again” class in September. Bonuses & $70 off until September 1st. Read about it here:

http://maryamwebster.com/ethosclass/

And if you’d like to reply to this article with your experiences, you can do that in the contact form below. I’d really love to read what you have to say. B-)

From friend Lisa Wilder’s blog comes this great though anonymous “Alternative 10 Commandments”

Ten Other Commandments To Live By

1.  You shall not worry, for worry is the most unproductive of all human activities.

2.  You shall not be fearful, for most of the things we fear never come to pass.

3.  You shall not carry grudges, for they are the heaviest of all life’s burdens.

4.  You shall face each problem as it comes. You can only handle one at a time anyway.

5.  You shall not take problems to bed with you, for they make very poor bedfellows.

6.  You shall not borrow other people’s problems. They can better care for them than you.

7.  You shall not try to relive yesterday for good or ill, it is forever gone. Concentrate on what is happening    in your life and be happy now.

8.  You shall be a good listener, for only when you listen do you hear ideas different from your own.

9.  You shall not become bogged down by frustration, for 90% of it is rooted in self-pity and will only interfere with positive action.

10. You shall count your blessings, never overlooking the small ones, for a lot of small blessings add up to a big one.

~ Author Unknown

There are so many lessons in Presence, in Community, Leadership and Cooperation we can learn from animals. Here’s just one more for the holidays. Before you roast that Christmas goose (if that’s your thing) check out what these community-minded fowl can teach us all.

Leadership Lessons We can Learn From Geese

Geese Fact: As each goose flaps its wings, it creates an “uplift” for the other birds to follow. By flying in a “V” formation, the whole flock adds 70% greater flying range than if each bird flew alone.

Our Lesson: People who share a common direction and a sense of community get where they are going quicker and easier — because they are traveling on the thrust of one another.

Geese Fact: When a goose falls out of formation, it suddenly feels the drag and resistance of flying alone. It quickly moves back into formation to take advantage of the lifting power of the bird immediately in front of it.

Our Lesson: If we have as much sense as a goose, we stay in formation with those headed where we want to go. We are willing to accept their help and give our help to others.

Geese Fact: When a goose tires, it rotates to the back of the formation as another goose flies to the point opposite.

Our Lesson: It pays to take turns doing the hard tasks and sharing leadership. As with geese, people are interdependent on each other’s skills, capabilities and unique arrangement of gifts, talents or resources.

Geese Fact: The geese flying in formation honk to encourage those up front to keep up their speed.

Our Lesson: We need to make sure our honking is encouraging. In groups — where there is encouragement to stand by one’s heart or core values and encourage the same in others — is the sort of honking we seek.

Geese Fact: When a goose gets sick, wounded or shot down, two geese drop out of formation and follow it down to help and protect it. They stay with it until it dies or is able to fly again. Then they launch out in formation and try to catch the flock.

Our Lesson: If we had as much sense as geese, we would stand by each other in difficult times as well as when we are strong.

Friendship and love, even across species. This is what it looks like. Check your heart when you look at this picture…that’s what it feels like. (see below for more)

It always amazes me when I meet people who won’t cosy up to another human being, who won’t accept help, whose stiff-necked pride depends on being “completely, totally independent”.  I used to see that a lot back when I was a social worker. And even today, in some who would consider it beneath them to accept a helping hand, or others who won’t reach out to their networks when they really need to.

Now I enjoy my financial independence, being an independent thinker and things like that, but will I accept a hug, a friendly nuzzle or a helping hand?  Oh, you betcha! And revel in the close-knit communities I enjoy being part of.

Come on, folks. It’s the holidays. If you really need to, and even if you don’t – reach out, please. You’ll be doing someone else the immense favor of allowing them the extreme blessing of giving, and yourself the equal blessing of receiving.  No perps, no victims – it’s an equal exchange. Think about it.

Ask  your mom or maiden aunt for a hug. Get your dad to help you check your tires or change a lightbulb. Sincerely ask a colleague’s opinion on your latest product or business thought. ‘Tis the season of giving, so give that blessing to others.

In that, we can all stand to learn a thing or two from our animal friends. The first thing we can all do with more of that this pair of buddies has down: friendship and love – even across different species. Thanks to Certified Energy Coach Carol Sanderell for sending this beautiful photo essay and heartwarming story of the fawn Finchen and her wild rabbit companion seen above.

The full essay (in  both German and English) with loads of pictures can be found here: http://www.tanja-askani.de/ Talk about magic, communication and inspiration! If you’re a big softie like me, you’ll cry tears of joy. Check out her other photos of interspecies communication.  Warm your cockles for darn sure.