Everyday Bliss For Women In Leadership

I’m in the last few days of doing author edits to my book, Everyday Bliss For Busy Women. I can’t tell you what a joy it will be to finally be done. My participation in the production will be limited from here on until the book hits the shelves of your local Borders or Barnes & Noble the first of May, 2008.

I was speaking to one of my clients, Susannah*, a corporate excecutive in prosthetic device manufacturing, about the feelings involved in finishing a big piece of work. She detailed the wind-down of a project she’s involved in:  "It’s funny" she said. "I have a sense of tremendous accomplishment in this project, it’s just like giving birth. But then there’s the letdown of not being pregnant any more. And I liked being pregnant!" she said emphatically. "But I also loved having my babies in the world to share with the rest of our family…just like I will be so glad to have this prosthesis out the door and doing good for people."

I know how you feel Susannah, I feel the same way about Everyday Bliss! I can’t wait until the book hits the shelves! In a way, I’ve had a "final week fantasy" that I finish the book, tons of women who’ve never heard of energy therapies learn about them and get themselves, their children and their whole families and communities free from stress, illness and fear. Wouldn’t that be just the best thing?

And on stress, I’ll share one of the Bliss Keys from the book:

"Nothing is truly required of you"

Past  your own survival needs, most of the stress we heap on ourselves is of our own making .Think about it…

*name changed to protect privacy

A little late on the ball, but in response to biz-buddy Krishna’s tag in her post: 8 random things about me

Do you AQ? If not, you might want to. AQ stands for Abundance Quotient and is a system developed by my friend Kim George to e-x-p-a-n-d the potential and possibilites of your life. I loved her newsletter intro of today so much I am reproducing it below as a sterling example of a wonderful Everyday Bliss mindset. Savor this delicious slice of summer savvy and get yourself on over to Kim’s site and sign up for her newsletter and classes today.
 

Kim

Talk about following your bliss, wait ’til you view this must-see inspirational movie. Paul Potts, cell phone salesman from Wales and not very impressive by his own admission in a cheap suit and bad haircut, knocked ‘em dead last night. This modest man whose dream it is to sing opera, blew the top off England’s answer to American Idol ("Britain’s Got Talent") with his rendition of Nessun Dorma, made famous by none other than opera virtuoso Luciano Pavarotti.

Both men and women in the audience were deeply moved, and gave him an enthusiastic standing ovation. Simon Cowell’s jaw literally dropped. Judge Amanda Holden wept…as did I, when I saw this stunning performance. Potts has overcome shattered collarbone, burst appendix and a host of other personal ills to appear on this program, because he had a dream. And nothing could keep him down. Now, he’s being considered to sing for the Queen herself.

Moral of the Story: Let nothing stand in the way of your dream. Nothing. 

You go Mr. Potts. The Queen is waiting, and the world is with you. Bravissimo!

Full Story, here: http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,21904047-2,00.html

It’s rare anymore, but I sometimes get potential clients who wonder why I refer them to other coaches when they say “But it’s YOU I really want to work with!”. Sometimes I feel I’m simply not the best coach for them and that what they really need is to be found with another coach I can refer them to. Sometimes people want coaching, but they really aren’t ready for the kind of intensity such a relationship can generate, or are a wee bit too comfortable in their rut to really work at change. Sometimes a different level of expertise or specialty is called for. And then, there are those who are simply “coachability impaired”.

To correct what may be a widespread assumption, coaches are not obliged to help all and sundry. Though many varieties of coaching exist for the wide variety of clients that exist, coaching by its very nature is a profession that demands one’s highest and best performance. To assure that, coaches are choosy and only work with clients that fit our particular skillsets and energetic bandwidth - just like other service providers. You don’t see a lawyer for a heart transplant. Likewise, a C-level executive seeking snappy, fast-paced high performance coaching wouldn’t employ a creativity, academic or ADD coach. For different needs there are different talents and specialties in the coaching world. That extends also to the personality of client being coached, in what we refer to as “coachability”.

To protect our energies and precious time from being wasted, we all have our red velvet ropes and sets of immutable parameters past which folks who aren’t at a certain level, are not permitted. To attempt to coach people who are resistant to change, aren’t ready for a coaching partnership or are not willing to expand their horizons would be an exercise in frustration and futility for both coach and client. Most experienced coaches can size potential clients like this up in a few heartbeats. It only takes a few to drain you dry before you develop such instincts. And in a nod to Bea, it’s not arrogance or snobbery, but self-preservation and conservation of resources at the heart of the golden restraining posts holding up that red velvet rope.

Thanks and a tippo of the “you said it” hat goes to Seth Godin for his Distinctionary entry below, on “What Coachable Means in Real Life”. You go, my brother.

Coachable

A friend is wrestling with his ability to be coached. For the coachable, “Turn right at the light” is seen as a helpful suggestion for someone lost in a strange town… the advice goes in, is considered and then acted upon. For someone wrestling with coaching, though, it’s like surgery. It’s painful, it has side effects and it might lead to a bad reaction.

Coaching happens all the time. Most often, it’s not from a boss or a professional coach. In fact, the best insights and advice usually come from informal or unexpected sources.

In fluid marketing and organization environments, where the world changes rapidly, coachability is a key factor in evolving and succeeding. Not because all advice is good advice. In fact, most advice is lousy advice. No, the reason coachability is so crucial is that without it, you don’t have the emotional maturity to consider whether the advice is good or not. You reject the process out of hand, and end up stuck.

Symptoms of uncoachability:

* Challenging the credentials of the coach
* Announcing that you’re being unfairly singled out
* Pointing out, angrily, that the last few times, the coach was wrong
* Identifying others who have succeeded without ever being coached
* Resisting a path merely because it was one identified by a coach

Years ago, at the great Bolshoi Ballet, auditions for the troupe were conducted among 8 year old girls. That’s because it took ten years to become great. How did the auditions work? The teachers weren’t looking for the best dancers. They were looking for the dancers who took coaching the best. The rest would come with time.

See the original at Seth Godin’s Blog, and Bea’s post on “Topgrading”.

I have a friend whom I dearly love - Kim George, author of Coaching Into Greatness and Director of the AQ Institute. A couple of weeks ago I had the pleasure of hanging out in Kim’s home for a week, and being her guest at a concert by acknowledged "young guitar god", Derek Trucks.

Kim wanted to introduce me to Derek’s work because he is, quite honestly, probably the greatest guitarist now living. Or at least one of the mega-greats. You look at what he does with his fingers and listen to the virtuosity, and  your mouth simply falls to the ground. It’s the kind of good that spins your heart, stomach and head all in different directions and leaves you wanting much, much more. Emotions you didn’t know you had bloom suddenly and make you ache, but in a good way. You don’t want the set to end. But I digress…

Some might know Derek as an Eric Clapton protege, or from his work with the Allman Brothers. But on May 17th in Torrington, Connecticut at the palatial Warner Theater, it was solely the Derek Trucks Band, resplendent in its own celebratory glory. 

We got there from deep in the wilderness of Massachussets through the backwoods express route into what seemed like nowhere. Thanks, Google Maps. After miles of beautiful trees, lakes, herds of man-sized mosquitoes, cud-munching Guernseys and a medieval fortress dam or two (one wondered if we hadn’t taken a turn into the Twilight Zone) we arrived in Torrington and had the time of our lives.

Kim has been a fan for ages, and I was a virgin conquest, brought to be sacrificed upon the altar of good music. My heart thumped, thighs quivered and as many before me, I became thoroughly infected with the DTB virus. We all had the DTB’s pretty bad, to be honest. But if you haven’t seen and heard Mr. Trucks and his quirky, amazing fellow musicians, you are missing one heck of a treat. They not only roll out good rock, soul, jazz, r&b and blues, but the personalities of each musician are as engaging as their repertoire. Holy hit parade Batman, but the dude can rock SOLID! If you’re into fancy fretwork, Derek Trucks is your man.

I snuck in my Casio Exilim and managed a few short  and shaky vidcaps between security-guard strafings, the light flashing from an adjacent teenager playing games on his cellphone, and bobbing and weaving of the extra-large-headed fellow right in front of my lens. There was by way of compensation, a nice fellow sitting next to me named John, who interestingly is moving to nearby Walnut Creek within the month. (Dude! Meet you at the Fillmore!)  He and Kim exchanged emails and furtive plans to move items of fandom across state lines…which I am assured is all quite legal…. 

Not my best, but here for Kim and the rest of the excessively *rabid* Derek Trucks fans, (and they’re all rabid) is this five minute-sumpin’ Video.  Be mindful of your speakers, download at will, and Enjoy…