» Archive for March, 2009

In Defense of Moms & Stock Farmers

Monday, March 30th, 2009 by Maryam Webster

On another post in the archives, a commenter by the name of Ted got a little upset at my repost of an Yahoo.com article on “Top 10 Stress-less Careers”.  I thought Ted’s comment was provocative enough to post (yes I approve vitriolic comments if they provide value) and also to answer. Here’s that thread, for the possible enlightenment it might provide:

farmer mom & chickenTed:
“This article is utter bull shit. Every one of those jobs is full of stress. They are either very stressful, too low paying to create financial stress (Maryam note: I think he means “too low paying SO they create financial stress”), or both. Try being an accountant. Every calculation you make must be accurate! And tax season is the worst.

Even being a masseuse causes your own muscles to tighten up. Who massages you? And a teacher? Try making ends meet on a teachers salary when you’ve baby sat a bunch of adolescents all day. You do no one any favors by propogating this drivel. It’s obviously written by someone who’s sitting at home, drinking tea and out of touch with the real world. Why? Because she’s figured out a way to make a stress free living by working 3 hours a day by writing useless garbage. I’d bet she’s living on a farm raising toddlers and chickens.”

(~*~*~*~*~ pause for interlude music ~*~*~*~*~ )

Hi Ted,
Can I recommend you take a chill pill? The vitriol here only indicates that YOU are stressed.  Your outlook effects your experience of life a great deal. My accountant is happy as a lark right now. It’s his outlook. He enjoys tax season and revels in the work it brings. If you’re an accountant and you don’t enjoy it, then you’re in the wrong job. Change your job to reduce  stress. It’s entirely doable, no matter how closed all avenues might seem. (see the end of this article)

You’re also making a lot of judgements that may or many not have any basis in reality. And your experience may be atypical. So…why “propagate such drivel” yourself?

To answer a few of your rants: who massages you? Your buddies – as a massage therapist, you develop cooperative relationships with other massage therapists. Been there, done that.  Teacher? Been there too – high school English. Most teachers who are in it as a career are doing it for love of the job..and don’t view it as “baby sitting”  – you demean teachers by this suggestion. The fact that you can read and write you owe to a teacher. Don’t disrespect them by suggesting their jobs amount to babysitting.

farmermom_son_wheatfieldBut before you jump on your keys to write a retort, I must correct the worst misperceptions you list: the job of “mom to toddlers” and also that of raising farm animals are two of the most time-consuming and stressful on the planet. Both require early hours until way late at night and in the middle of the night when a child or animal is ill or a large animal is giving birth. (woman and farmer? Resources here) There’s no calling in a workmate to handle your load when you “don’t feel like” going in to work or are sick yourself.

Moms and stock farmers work through it all – no exceptions.  Respect.

The next time you eat a steak, chop or chicken breast think about that. The next time you take a breath or do anything with your mind or body, you can thank your mother for that. Like her or not, you wouldn’t be here without her and whomever raised you to adulthood. If you were as angry then as you exhibit here…it probably wasn’t a 100% pleasant job.

Finally, the article didn’t say zero stress, just less stress. Perhaps I should adjust the title (already done)…but really, is all the venom-spouting necessary? If destressing is important to you then I recommend:

http://maryamwebster.com/stressrelief

or your favorite aerobic exercise.

Also, know that you can step away from this and into your own Unlimited Self, where the problems, stress and upset don’t exist.  You started out in life Unlimited, able to make your life anything you choose. You still have that power and that choice, no matter what your station in life or how crappy your job or living situation. Ask yourself  – “Would an Unlimited being choose to remain this angry, upset and stressed-out?” More here:

http://ethosmethod.ning.com

Have a good one Ted – Be Good to You!

.

April Unplugged

Monday, March 30th, 2009 by Maryam Webster

One of the things that I’ve truly “gotten” on my hiatus is that I have not allowed myself enough down-time and really need some quality unplugging. No computer, no tv, getting back to a spare, but rich, non-tech lifestyle. Accordingly, for the entire month of April, but for the master class in ETHOS I’m doing for Adela Rubio:

http://selfcaremastery.com/maryam

and a radio interview I’m doing for Connecting Women, I will be completely offline AND off email – our offices, help desk and all connection outlets will be closed.

I’d like to share a lesson from this that I have learned as it will be beneficial for anyone to think about. That is, we have many yardsticks in our lives – many ways of measuring the shoulds and musts. And though we may have come to the point of removing the words “should” and “must” from our vocabulary, those very ideas exist in our molecular structure as strong encodings.

In my case, the coding was around “I *should* be able to rest from a week of work in the two days of the weekend and be okay” and “I *should* be able to  work during the day from 9-5 as others do”.

But my system is not set up that way – it never has  been. I’m an owl, not a lark. A small percentage of the extremely creative (some call them “renaissance people”) have biorhythms that predispose them to work at their best, and to high proficiency on a variety of topics, later in the day. Voltaire, DaVinci, Michelangelo, Tesla and Bill Clinton are among those whose bodies also favored a night-owl lifestyle. I work best in the late afternoon and evening, sleep around 6 – 7 hours at most (7 is almost too much and 8 is definitely oversleeping) and usually work on several projects at once by preference. And I need more than two days to be “off” on the weekend.

My long-suffering workhorse parents despaired of me ever being respectable in the sleep department. I happily created in the wee hours, even as a child. Well-meaning though it was, they used every moral imperative to suggest that I was not a righteous person for being a night-owl and if I kept up “these shenanigans” I would not mature into a good upstanding citizen. Mother consulted Reverend Pegues when I was seven over this perceived fault, with the result that I was awakened every morning at 6am without fail to pray and read the Bible before school in the hopes of rehabilitating my wayward biorhythms.

It didn’t work. I slept through third period in school, refusing to be rousted, and stayed up at night until my body told me it was time to sleep. It exasperated Mother no end, but she finally gave up and when she saw that I was doing cool things – nature photography and essays in philosophy at that point.  She even briefly catered to my 10pm dinner habit  and harbored hopes that I might turn into Imogen Cunningham. No such luck though.

In the intervening years, I’ve found it’s always best to do what my body tells me it needs. When I do that, I am never sick or tired, and am always at my best and sharpest.

Late last year however,  though it was a relatively minor thing, I fell prey again to the moralizing of others around my natural biorhythms and tried to be early-to-bed-early-to-rise to join with a group of yoga friends who were all early risers and determined to make me one as well. And I mean, sunrise type early, greeting the day with Surya Namaskar as the sun crested the local Diablo hills.

The result was that I became out of sorts and was tired quite a lot which is very unusual for me. And even though I love writing more than life itself sometimes, computers, Twitter and email began to irritate me severely. These were cardinal signs to me that I was not honoring my body’s needs and was one of the ingredients in my decision to take a hiatus from business in January.

I naievely thought that my break would begin in January, but no, tying up ends so I actually could take a break took well into February. Then a conference came in March with heavy email, Twitter involvement and text messaging before and after, pushing things even further out.

So drop-dead earnest here, April is my month off. Completely away from the computer. Even cellphone. Don’t send me an EM, IM, DM, TxT or Skypee because I’m nailing the keyboard to the desk upside down and locking the mouse in a drawer. Not kidding.

I’m taking this unplugged break both for my own self-care and health, as well as research for an interesting article, or it might even be a book that I am writing. It keeps extending itself so it could well be the next book. <grin> More much later about that though.

The Moral of the Story Is… that there is no moral imperative around what the body needs. Each of us is wonderfully diverse in our unique makeup.  We all have slightly to profoundly different needs for food, water, sunshine or darkness, sleep or waking, downtime,  romance-time, exercise and alone-time.

That old biblical verse about the plank in your own eye comes to bear here. If someone in your life isn’t configured the same way you are don’t bring your judgements against them. Take care of your own needs and support each other to extreme and joyous acts of self-care, no matter what the hands on the clock say, no matter how different you might be to each others.

Diversity is what makes the world go ’round, be interesting and create genius.

Meanwhile, have a *beautiful* and *joyous* spring!

With Love,
Maryam

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-03-29

Sunday, March 29th, 2009 by Maryam Webster
  • Shalalala-Shalalala! RT @shaboom: Help plan The Self Employment Telesummit and win a platinum ticket http://bit.ly/rz47G #selfemployment #
  • BTW for #EarthHour don’t forget not just computer! Turn off lites, TV, unplug charging cords. EV-RAY-THANG! :-D #
  • Powering down for #earthhour – cut the power, save a tree…or words to that effect. Later gators! :-) #
  • RT @prosperitygal: A man fails 7x & rises 8x. |M: My Mom sez: “Honey, No Man gets it up 8x in a row. He must be on Viagra” ROTFL! #
  • RT @jonathanrussell: @maryamwebster thanks for the RTs |M: Hey homeboy! My pleasure… ;-) #
  • RT @murnahan: @maryamwebster LOL! Funny stuff! |M: I live to chortle. ;-) #
  • OMG – iced coffee made at home w/Peets Maj. Dickason blend, cinnamon, Truvia, half-n-half. Got warm in the San Francisco Bay area today… #
  • It’s official, I’m a fan of Truvia non-sugar sweetener: http://bit.ly/i5O5 They’ve finally found a ($$$) way to make stevia taste good #
  • Hey all you brownie-with-glasses folks ( o_O ’s ) out there – put up your picture so we can see your bright smiling face! :-D #
  • Gratitude begets abundance. What r u giving #gratitude for? Grateful 4 love of my kitties who won’t get off me long enuf 2 let me eat ; -) #
  • RT @jonathanrussell: RT @upicks: 6 Tips For Building Deeper Connections With #Twitterhttp://tr.im/hVWH – Simple guide anyone can follow #
  • Worked out @ gym 1 hour circuit, 30 mins cardio, treat of iced coffee after. Making sure treats happen makes healthy habits easy to keep up. #
  • RT @markress: 4 thoz interested plz RT: Couple of slides 2 explain PageRank http://twitpic.com/2jggx & this slide http://twitpic.com/2jgle #
  • Watch this whole channel. ROTFL’s all ’round! RT @ShermanHu: My 10yo son sent me this. Addiction intervention? http://tinyurl.com/d32yf8 :) #
  • RT @ShermanHu: A Twitter Spinoff Launches for Moms http://tr.im/hVum #
  • What is Genius? http://post.ly/Br1 #
  • #SocMedia explained by felt board cutouts: http://bit.ly/9vPK @LeeLeFever “our product is explanation” – sheer genius: http://bit.ly/SLC68 #
  • RT @murnahan: RT @iamkhayyam: Retweet their salads!! http://is.gd/pmLx (you guys were too much!) #
  • RT @andreawarner: I love that article! Are you a practicing psychologist? |M: Ummm, depends what u mean by that but yes, by & lrg I am. ;-) #
  • We tweet, because we are a culture starved for real community. As a psychologist, can’t say I disagree. http://bit.ly/WIsKp #
  • Gonna go solicit the hubbers for game of backgammon & late nite glass of bubbly. Sleep sweet, Twitterverse! LYLAS! #
  • Hilarity heard from the inner compound: “Okay, who ordered the extra anchovy catnip liver supreme pie? GAWD, your breath, ‘Noushka!” #
  • *RAWR!* YES! RT @momlogic: Camping Is The New Caribbean. Not just 4 treehuggers. Would you do it with your family? http://twurl.nl/hkn8yz #
  • Ooo! RT @EFTRadio: EFT for Eyesight: I got rid of my glasses using EFT; free teleclass this SUN http://bit.ly/3M6fT0 #
  • Do u know @KammieK ’cause she’s so cool, must follow her tweets or you’re a fool…thanks for your sparkle, Kammie!!! (& yr welcome ;-) #
  • RT @colmcgunnigle: RT @IvanCampuzano: Be who u are and say what you feel – those who mind don’t mattr/those who mattr don’t mind. ~Dr. Seuss #
  • Besides being hilarious, this is all 2 *true* #socmedia pals, is this U? RT @murnahan: “New Media Douchebags Explained” http://bit.ly/4NR3X #
  • RT @JohnMarden: http://tinyurl.com/dbr8pq The beauty of the Internet. Talk about a niche market and the “long tail”. #
  • 52 Tips for Using Social Media Effectively – particularly for non-profits: http://bit.ly/iHP0v #
  • May switch to iPhone (finally). Great vid on how to force ATT to offer you a Month-to-Month Plan instead of 2yrs on iPhone startup. w00t! #
  • Verizon Wireless sucks so badcannot begin to detail particulars. Wanted more private info than I’m willing to give to help on my acct. FAIL #
  • RT @eftpraxis: Twappers! welcm 2 @SueMcKenney new twapper amongst us! @eft4adoption @creativeeft @emotionalengine @moneymakeover2 @chipeft #
  • RT @iamkhayyam: How To Develop A Vision That Will Make You Millions http://ow.ly/1zqW #
  • RT @skinnyjeans: Have a glass of water with dinner. Not only are you hydrating the water will help fill you up to help prevent overeating. #
  • Spent marvellous lazy afternoon w/BFF & biz colleague @ninaprice. You’ll be able to see some of it soon as video uploads ;-) #
  • Thanks for RT’s @brentmcnutt, @colmcgunnigle, @pgforte! Agree w/you PG, on the writing front. Is mah main obsession! ;-) #
  • For sheer genius of all types, follow: @tomhoobyar @guykawasaki @skydiver @murnahan #
  • Lunch today with @ninaprice. I’ve been sticking my tongue out at her for years…she’s my acupuncturist. ;-) Worth a follow! #followfriday #
  • More #followfriday marketing geniuses: @markress @davidbullock @bunltd @lenapple @colderice @brentmcnutt @colmcgunnigle @kammiek @murnahan #
  • Hey @andyfranco, think u might mean me, but it’s “Maryam” (not Mary) Webster ;-) Thanks btw! Off to do my Hundreds… ;-) #
  • RT @christianfea: What are top 3 things you want to be known for and can contribute to? Incorporate that into your daily marketing messages #
  • Y’all #followfriday @pitchengine , @leesabarnes, @socialedge, @shermanhu, @paullemberg, @christianfea & @feleciaslattery 4 marketing chops! #
  • RT @michaelport: Warning: the cheap prices of small thoughts breaks down the obstinate resistance of our bold, big thoughts. #followfriday #
  • RT @coachdavender: People who’ve RT’d or replied 2 me recently (tx!) …@maryamwebster #followfriday |M: Tx Davender – Y’all follo CoachD! #
  • Interesting 2 note aftr yrs of self-work, as was being driven off road by idiot in monster truck evolutn took ovr: wanted 2 rip his face off #
  • RT @ShermanHu: to doctor’s today for stronger antibiotics. Will flush out system ltr w natural stuff! |M: Worth note, natural tks longer :-( #
  • RT @odemagazine: 7 ways to start writing http://tinyurl.com/d5l76q #
  • RT @AnnEvanston: @maryamwebster thanks Maryam you are fabulous! Energy worker check out Maryam! #followfriday |M: Tx Ann & back atcha! #
  • RT @leesabarnes: catch the canada marketing summit live online via http://TwitPWR.com/a6J/ #cms09 #
  • RT @shermanhu: #FollowFriday (me) 4 her health/wellness brilliance, friendship & taking time 2 help @sarahhu |M: *blush* Thanks buddy!!! #
  • The scaly, sucking vortex of your navel & the fluff it collects is the subject of a new thesis: http://snipr.com/enrr4 Now We Know. #
  • Major risk factors 4 #breastcancer : http://snipr.com/enrig Plus: Yoga eases treatment: http://is.gd/pcR2 #
  • Hee! The Mythbusters get more bang for the buck in my ‘hood: http://short.to/2yke #
  • Hm..it’s vira trafficl, says it’s free…and it’s recommended by @MikeFilsaime. Could it work for you? http://snipr.com/enqar #
  • GR8 List of 8 Ways to Get New Blog Subscribers: http://jijr.com/Sqk Yep, I also need to take heed… ;-) #
  • Just added myself to the http://wefollow.com twitter directory under: #marketing #speaker #women #
  • Hey @andymatic check this out: RT @learn_marketing: Cool video: Gay Social Networking Sites http://tinyurl.com/d3yts4 #
  • RT @ShermanHu: Qs: Should I use this pic for my Twitter profile http://twitpic.com/2hina |M: Love it SH! #
  • RT @TomHoobyar: cowboy’s view of the CEO http://ping.fm/IwgXr |M: Tom, was a privilege hearing this metaphor in person @ NLP Cafe last nite! #
  • RT @lkr: Playing with hootsuite, i HATE the name….|M: Assonant w/”Toute suite” (French for: “hurry”) Hoot=Tweet in Elder Owlish. ;-) #
  • RT @connectingwomen: OMG. That is terrible. Are you ok? |M: Yes, thanks Faten, but gee whiz! Some ppl REALLY shld lrn 2 share the road! #
  • Almost killed! GINORMOUS TRUCK driver nevr learnd 2play w/othrs -honked, gunned engine, drove me back dn street just short of my own drivewy #
  • RT @ShermanHu: 6 Buzzworthy Laws All Web Marketers Should Understand http://bit.ly/hLEW6 #
  • RT @ShermanHu: 49 Amazing Social Media, Web 2.0 And Internet Stats http://bit.ly/f7jZ9 #
  • RT @KimFalconer: New Moon in Aries=Boldness. |M: I solemnly swear I am up to no good, & that I will be myself no matter who can’t handle it. #
  • RT @shaboom: Don’t use your business to make friends… |M: Tho, friendship often comes 1st – people like to buy from those they kno, trust #
  • RT @RetiredTeacherD: RT @AnnEvanston just booked @maryamwebster 2 speak …She is a brilliant biz woman! M: Thanks for the RT!! :-) #
  • RT @KammieK: I’m SOO over hearing the term “economic crisis”… |M: “abundance opportunity” or “False Evidence Appearing Real” (FEAR) ;-) #
  • “Guru” call pointers: Don’t flatter aud. 2excess w/ 5 mins content/55 mins heavy upsell, egoic shills + condescention & expect my business. #
  • RT @iSkip: @maryamwebster Thought FB was changing back, but no telling us to “get used to it.” |M: Hence my hilarity. Too funny! #
  • My girls and I are having a #gno w/movie & coffee after, so this is goodnight Twitterverse. Revel in how little pressure u cn put on yrself! #
  • Choosing theme for my main site redo for 2 months now. Seriously, it shouldn’t be this hard. I admit it, I’m a graphic perfectionist *sigh* #
  • OMG, what a great find. Ladies, get on it! RT @RedHotCopy Luv this: “The world will be saved by the western woman.” H.H., The Dalai Lama #
  • RT @unmarketing: Sometimes you lose followers … (M: Corollary: Sometimes ppl who RT’d you lots suddenly stop) Don’t take either personally #
  • Rolling on floor laughing & kicking feet in glee: RT @techxav: Facebook Surrenders to Users’ Redesign Revolt http://tinyurl.com/dzkuen #
  • RT @Paul_Lemberg: Guaranteed Progress Formula: 1)Decide on the change 2)Have way to measure the change 3)Execute actions to make change #
  • RT @motivationmama: Motivation Tip – Here’s the truth: A downturn is really the time to prepare 4 the upswing. Don’t end up unprepared! #
  • Bottom frozen to chair? Physical procrastinators – take time out to refresh, renew & connect w/body. Now. You’ll be so blissful! Ahh… #
  • Parsing an old interview http://bit.ly/2C5V0f CoreLesson: Tk chrge of health & REFUSE 2 accept others limitations on WHAT U CAN ACCOMPLISH! #
  • RT @shaboom: Asking for help, especially when I don’t know what I need: recipe for breakthrough. |M: Molly, beautiful! :@) #
  • Just had a FUN call w/biz maven @AnnEvanston & will be speaking 2 her local eWomen network. Woo! Check Ann out, she has a COOL Sword! ;-) #
  • NO! Making Pizza Cristina w/ #gfree rice wrap: Basil, cilantro, Blk Forest Ham, Arugula, Grana Padano, check. but NO TRUFFLE OIL! AAAGH! #
  • Hey Lennie, only as awesome as those I RT! ;-) @lenapple: @maryamwebster – You are so AWESOME! Thanks for the props! #
  • Was all MY pleasure! Re: @ShermanHu: @maryamwebster Thx soooo much 4 chatting w @sarahhu abt her health & stuff. Really apprc8 ya! U ROCK!! #
  • Goodnight Twitterverse, yoga, pranayama & cuddles are waiting…in that order ;-) #
  • RT @markburgess The most valuable asset in your business is you! Do yourself a favor…be the best at what you do! #
  • RT @gotmelik: 10 Rare HTML Tags You Really Should Know http://bit.ly/W2mVy (via @Minervity & @Othella) #
  • RT @ShermanHu: Customer Service is the New PR http://tr.im/hIPl by @steverubel #
  • If you’re in a corporate rut, @skinnyjeans wrote 1 of most amazing & brutally honest guides to getting out. Check it: http://bit.ly/MqjqI #
  • RT @brentmcnutt: Nope, I wish! Found out abt it few months ago. Guest at #SNL7 of the fantastic @shermanhu. Will jump on nxt time tho! #
  • RT @ShermanHu: Psychology of color in retail http://tr.im/hINL |M: Xlnt 4all 2 study. I used to consult on color as corp psych. Tx SH! #
  • #ideaparty @competent 4 ALL online biz: sideways leverage – every article repurposed in video, podcast, teleclass, Twitter…4 max exposure #
  • #ideaparty #competent 4 ALL online biz: sideways leverage – every article repurposed in video, podcast, teleclass, Twitter…4 max exposure #
  • #ideaparty http://homeshare.org/aboutus.aspx Tells you how to get time from caring for your elders, FREE ppl to take care of them #
  • #ideaparty Caring 4 Elders & need 2 get away: Find others in same situ. that live close. U exchange care few days/week to get days off #
  • Happening RIGHT NOW: Your Selling Point @ #IdeaParty RT @BarbaraSher: (712) 432-0075 Code: 147182# TONIGHT March 23, 8pm to 2am, EST #
  • RT @michaelport: Together we will find out inner strength, the root of big thinking, and nothing and no one can thwart us. |M: Go Michael! #
  • This was SO good @ #stompernet! RT @colderICE: Barack 2.0 Social Media Lessons For Business: The Tactics That Won – Part 1 http://ow.ly/1jsk #
  • RT @AlexisNeely: Ladies, taking time to connect with yourself bodily every day? when I do, I’m so grateful. #
  • RT @brentmcnutt: People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care. |M: True that! #
  • Marijuana=vomiting???: http://tinyurl.com/casq4m |M: SCARE TACTIC: pot is an ANTI-emetic, used in cancer 2 keep food down. Faux science :-( #
  • RT @marshallk: Tomorrow is Ada Lovelace Day, Celebrating the World’s First Computer Programmer http://bit.ly/298Xg3 #
  • RT @jenlouden: RT @LisaBraithwaite: Today’s blog post: 101 Women Bloggers to Watch for in 2009 (I’m on the list!) http://tinyurl.com/cbhx6o #
  • RT @skinnyjeans: RT @twitterbo options 4 sugar alternatv http://short.to/2q2w ..I use agave nectar & raw sugar |M: Truvia, v. good but $$$ #
  • RT @dianecesa: Yoga Blog Post: Releasing Winter and Joyfully Jumping into Spring: Despite today’s chilly tempera.. http://tinyurl.com/cgbrt7 #
  • Late start as morning stuffed with new focus group respondent interviews. Such a wealth of information! Have you focus grouped yr niche? #
  • RT @davidbullock, RT @johnjaworski: We determine our strategy. Following herd (often 2 slaughter) not best choice. You CAN change YR game #
  • RT @om: Skype Now Means Business, Gettin’ SIPpy with it… http://tinyurl.com/depzez #
  • RT @ShermanHu: 3 Turnkey Shopping Carts (non-WP) I wld use: Interspire.com/shoppingcart, Volusion.com & MagentoCommerce.com #
  • http://twitpic.com/2d3ld#
  • in Rodin’s hell at Stanford Univ’s Cantor museum w/ @jfrankenfield. See the Door 2 Purgatory @ Twitpic. #

What is Genius?

Saturday, March 28th, 2009 by Maryam Webster

Posted via web from maryamwebster’s posterous

Working Moms Facing Layoffs, Reduced Telecommute Privileges

Thursday, March 26th, 2009 by Maryam Webster

mom-at-work-laptop-babyIn the last eighteen months or so, mothers are hesitating to nurse at work – assuming the workplace still provides daycare. They are not asking for time off to deal with a child’s needs, and are neglecting their own health to work when ill themselves. Moms, are you afraid to ask for time off to deal with your child’s parent-teacher meeting, illness or botched daycare arrangement? Are you choosing NOT to telecommute for fear of losing your job?

As job cuts roll through all  industries in America and abroad, job privileges are increasingly being reduced and the more traditional job-centric workers being favored over parents who telecommute or ask for time off to deal with their children’s issues.  This recent article by Annys Shinn from the Washington Post asks: “Will Working From Home Lead to a Layoff? Recession Pushes Some to Eliminate Flexible Job Policies.”  -

Emily Muschinske, mother of two in South Orange, N.J., says she “could see the purse strings kind of closing” before her job was cut.  “Anybody with a flexible arrangement feels like their job is on the line,” said Muschinske, who cut back to working four days a week after her son, Jake, was born three years ago. Muschinske cited her reduced work schedule as a major factor in her recent layoff.

With the recession forcing businesses to cut back on workers, employees are increasingly doing all they can to hang onto their jobs and are forgoing many of the benefits that once allowed them to balance the demands of work and family life.

In good times, workers frequently seized the opportunity to use “flex time” and family leave, to telecommute and to take paid sick days. But, according to workplace consultants, human resources specialists and employees themselves, those days are slipping away. More workers are giving up those arrangements, or resisting asking about them in the first place, out of fears that doing so will make them appear less committed to their work and therefore more expendable.

Some workers’ advocates say they are particularly concerned about the consequences for women.

There’s now a “silent fright” among workers, said Joanne Brundage, executive director of Mothers & More, a 21-year-old networking group, likening the atmosphere to what she saw 20 years ago, when working mothers were advised not to keep pictures of their children in their cubicles…   (view the entire article here)

Shocking that we are regressing to pre-1990’s company policies.  Does this frighten you? Piss you off? Make you want to scream? Or maybe this whole thing opens up new horizons and opportunities for you? If you have an idea feel free to post your comments, thoughts, or strategies for other professional moms below…

ETHOS URL change & Tattle-tale Interview w/Maryam

Saturday, March 21st, 2009 by Maryam Webster

Maryam here, hoping this finds you well in the world and standing firmly inside your Un*limited Self today. I’m still taking time off on a creative hiatus, but there were a few things I wanted to let you in on today so thought I’d put a word your way.

I have a useful, no-cost audio for you below, that tattles on my life at the point of the interview, some practical tips on letting go and incorporates GREAT energy coaching… But first, a brief update on our Energy Transformation and Healing Open Source, or “ETHOS” Community:

If you were not able to view our ETHOS Method Community from Thursday through Saturday this week, you weren’t the only one. To avoid further difficulty and give you the best experience, we’ve reverted the site back to its Ning.com (the software where we host the site) URL to avoid any more issues with the community being available to you. This change will be permanent. Please CHANGE OLD BOOKMARKS for ETHOS to:

http://ethosmethod.ning.com

Please Note: our old URL: http://community.ethosmethod.com is no longer valid.

maryam_with_edbbooksmAnd now a gift, from my dear friend and student Liz Lichti and her business partner Laura Whitelaw, a few well…interesting answers to the question you may have been wanting to ask: Why did I walk away from my business to follow my Bliss? (this is me at right a couple of months ago feeling pretty blissful, with The Book. After a day in the pool, man, was I ever sunburned!)

You’ll also learn how, when and why you can (and sometimes SHOULD) drop everything to follow your own Bliss too.

Get the scoop AND experience a live ETHOS demo with Laura, Liz and myself, in their Way to Bliss Now community and you’ll get a sweet bonus audio of theirs on abundance, as well:

http://thewaytoblissnow.com/blog/download-for-interview-with-maryam-webster

Hope you enjoy it!  I look forward to seeing your thoughts if you’d like to post them, in the ETHOS Method Community forums. And if you’ve never visited or posted before, this is your engraved invitation! It’s all here for you:

http://ethosmethod.ning.com

Further on me? Well, I’m having a lot of epiphanies, learning a lot of new things and reformulating the idea of what true value I would like to bring you in the future. I hope you’re following your own bliss and living in the Now, stepped fully inside your own precious, unique Unlimited Self and having a ton of fun with yourself, every day.

Health & Happiness!

Warm Blessings,
Maryam

If You’re Not Profitable Yet…

Tuesday, March 17th, 2009 by Maryam Webster

Please consider this. My friend Mark Ress, who is doing really amazing things with teaching the public how to spin money pretty much for free is one of the speakers, the fantastic Radar Roy whom I met at Stompernet is another – he teaches you how to get people to literally run to your site and buy. I can’t go (dang!) but if you can, it’s a no-brainer. They’re even giving out scholarships but there’s only 12 spots left so, check it out if you want to get in on it:

Offline Gold Summit - April 25th to April 26th

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Concerned About Breast Cancer & Poisons in Deodorants? Make Your Own! (my recipe)

Monday, March 16th, 2009 by Maryam Webster

(For 3-way Natural No-Junk Deodorant recipe, scroll to the bottom)

In my unending quest for a natural, junk-and-aluminum-free deodorant, I’ve tried them all. None work past a few hours which is basically what I would get with soap and water alone. Recently a friend clued me to the otherwise-pristine Tom’s Of Maine product, “Natural Long-Lasting Care 12 Hour Odor Protection Aluminum-Free Deodorant Stick”. This stick smells like Lemondrop candy and contains both lemongrass and hops to inhibit odor-causing bacteria. And it works like a charm, up into the next day.

But wait a minute shoppers, the first ingredient is propylene glycol, which is a potential poison. Propylene Glycol is chemically related to ethylene glycol, the syrupy ingredient in antifreeze and is used as a less-toxic antifreeze itself – it’s that pink stuff you’ve seen hosed over your winter flight to de-ice wings of the plane.

Saving lives that way = great. But “PG” as it is often noted in ingredient listings, has been directly implicated in cases of iatrogenic renal toxicity (1) when used as a carrier for intravenous solutions. And skin contact causes “…moderate skin irritation. Contact with the skin may cause erythema, dryness, and defatting” (multiply this if you apply deodorant directly after shaving) with chronic use causing “reproductive and fetal effects. Laboratory experiments have resulted in mutagenic effects. Exposure to large doses may cause central nervous system depression…” (2)

Odd that this substance would turn up in products destined for the most delicate skin on our bodies! PG is used to make a stick deodorant solidify. Hey Tom’s – if you’re listening, what about vegetable glycerine or Zimea as a substitute for propylene glycol? Or ANYTHING but this unnatural substance? Derived from natural gas though you say it is, it’s not something I want on my body.

And if you’re going with “The Crystal” in solid or spray form, be aware that it contains potassium alum, a salt of aluminum, so you’re still getting aluminum under your arms.

While the Tom’s deodorant doesn’t thankfully carry alum or parabens, many so-called “natural” deodorants do. Parabens are an even more toxic substance. Methyl, ethyl and propyl paraben are common preservatives in many cosmetics and have been implicated in breast cancer (3, 4) as they mimic the action of estrogen, which has been implicated in breast tumor growth.

From a great article from Dr. Kris McGrath which has great graphic of lymph proliferation into breast tissue at: http://bit.ly/y0kVT

“In a recent study 18 of 20 breast tumors contained parabens (synthetic preservatives) found in underarm products. Parabens mimic estrogen, and estrogen can drive tumor growth (Journal of Applied Toxicology, February, 2004).

The underarm is a gateway to the lymphatic system, which is an essential part of the immune system, and helps the body fight infection and diseases such as cancer”

Okay, so what can we do about all this who want a deodorant and don’t want to pay the poisonous piper? Either find a viable commercial option, or make your own! I’ve made my own deodorant for ages and while it’s not a perfect solution, if you’re worried about breast toxicity, it’s worthwhile to experiment. Recipes follow, but first…

Dr. McGrath whom quoted above, writes for a site that I’ve just been in contact with, TerraNaturals.

Terra Naturals - Natural Deodorants


The formulary and owner, Tanya Workman, assures me her products contain NO PG, NO Parabens and NO aluminum or other unhappy junk. Just what do they contain and how do they work? That’s a really interesting topic! I interviewed Tanya and that will be the subject of a new article. But in the meantime, if you’d like to look, research or purchase, you can do that by clicking the banner above, OR, make your own.

Auntie M’s Natural Deodorant Recipe

natural-deodorants
Please understand that with any natural deodorant you may need to re-apply partway through your day for maximum effect. This may be a hassle, but it beats the living shit out of having breast cancer. My sympathies for those who find this a “bore” are on par with my sympathies with those who find drinking lots of water to be inconvenient because god-forbid, they might have to pee. ‘Nuff said.

Caveat: Essential oils are strong by themselves and must be used sparingly on human skin. NEVER ingest essential oils. Mix ONLY 6 drops of any of the following organic essential oils, or use any two in combination. These oils are universally regarded as safe and non-irritating in low concentrations but your mileage may vary, so be sensitive to your own reactions. Including vegetable glycerine where noted below will soothe skin and minimize irritation.

Anti-Bacterial /Anti-Odor Oils:
cedar, clary sage, cypress, lavender, lemon, lemongrass, orange, rosewood, sandalwood, tea tree, thyme

A good mix is clary sage, lemon, tea tree and lavender. Another is lemongrass, tea tree, cypress, cedar & sandalwood. Or a simple mixture of lavender and tea tree. Try different mixtures for yourself and see which you like.

Add 1/8tsp Vitamin E oil, or pierce two Vitamin E oil capsules and add to the oil mix. Vitamin E is a stabilizer and will act to preserve the essential oil mix. You could also use benzoin tincture if you are going with an alcohol base.

For a Spray:

Add the oil mixture to 1/2 cup vodka or Everclear alcohol and put in a spray bottle. Mix in a few drops of vegetable glycerine and a tablespoon of water. Shake well each time you use.

For a Powder:

Mix oils into 1/2 cup cornstarch and 1/2 cup baking soda thoroughly with a fork. Baking soda is a deodorizer and neutralizes the acids that odor-causing bacteria secrete. Cornstarch is now recommended over talc as a body powder as it causes no lung complications if inhaled, and is what is found in commercial baby powders. Caution: don’t use baby powder as it contains other chemicals you and baby don’t need! Plain, inexpensive cornstarch from the grocery store works just fine.

Place the soda, cornstarch, essential oil mixture into an clean spice container with a shaker top and shake well before each use. Wash underarms, pat dry and apply deodorant with a powder puff, or dry hands.

For a Deodorant Cream:

If you want a slightly wetter mixture, or deodorant the consistency of a cream, make the powder version and add vegetable glycerine or a good organic facial cold cream by the teaspoon, blending with a fork until desired consistency is achieved. This will be more moisturizing on the delicate skin of the armpit. Stop just short of the point where mixture would become too greasy for comfort.

When using this version it can be sticky. You can powder the cream down with plain cornstarch or make a special fragrant powder with a few drops of sandalwood or ylang-ylang, for the purpose. The cream form is ideal for putting into a container and taking with you for re-use throughout your day. Great form for taking to the gym, along with a small shaker of deodorant powder.

BTW, all of these recipes work well on feet, too! :-)


Sleepless in Silicon Valley

Monday, March 16th, 2009 by Maryam Webster

Local Joke: ”Can I tell you about our fine new Silicon Valley sleep technology sir?” Customer ”Why yes” Salesperson ”Well you see, each mattress comes with a built-in chip that keeps your partner at their IT job until the wee hours, so the at-home partner gets a more restful night’s sleep…”

This is local graveyard humor that I began to hear in the 90’s and it’s only gotten worse. Now with the recession, one in six people I know is losing their job, has lost it recently or has been hunting for work upwards of a year with no luck. And they’re tossing on their mattresses and causing the whole family to lose a good night’s sleep. Average night’s sleep is down from 7.7 hours in the early 1990’s to 6.4 hours as of 2006. Here are some statistics from TreatInsomnia.com:

  • Sleep problems are reaching epidemic proportions, estimated to be the #1 health related problem in America – (CNN, May 1997.)
  • Sleep deprivation costs $150 billion each year in higher stress and reduced worker productivity-(National Commission on Sleep Disorders, 2003.)
  • Almost all adults don’t get enough sleep and most struggle to get up in the morning. “If we got enough sleep at night we wouldn’t need an alarm clock to wake us.” (Mayo Clinic).
  • Recent studies implicate sleep deprivation in diabetes.
  • We sleep on average 6.9 hours/day, almost an hour less than a few decades ago.
  • Parents of young children lose an extra hour of sleep each night. (NSF 2004.)
  • Childhood sleeplessness is a high risk factor for adolescent alcohol and drug abuse-children with sleep problems are twice as likely to abuse drugs when teenagers. (Univ. of Mich. April 2004 sleep study.)
  • 43 percent of respondents reported that daytime sleepiness interfered with their normal daytime activities, including work. (NSF 2000.)
  • 30-40% of heavy truck accidents are due to driver fatigue. National Sleep Foundation, 2002 Annual Sleep Survey.
  • Almost 74% of all Americans do not get enough sleep each night.
  • Most will feel sleepy or groggy during the week.
  • 51% of adults say they have problems sleeping at least a few nights each week.
  • Almost 1/3 has trouble sleeping every night.
  • Half of all Americans can not get up without an alarm clock.
  • Alarm clocks interrupt sleep cycle causing, lack of energy, feeling not refreshed in the morning.
  • Those with sleep problems are twice as likely to feel stressed and tired.

Really simple fix for some of the issues of insomnia is to tap on the EFT acupoints over and over again until mind is calmed and body relaxed – only takes a few minutes. Here: http://maryamwebster.com/eftbasics.

 

 

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